Be Early.

I'm late, I'm late 

For a very important date.

No time to say hello, good-bye,

I'm late, I'm late, I'm late

I'm late.

The White Rabbit 


Oh, the poor white rabbit. Always late. No time to say hello, he scurries around in a constant state of stress.

Yesterday, Eric and I traveled to a funeral. The trip required three ferries: the first two are short ferries that run continuously, no reservation needed. The third ferry runs hourly and requires a prepaid reservation. If we missed that ferry, we’d miss the funeral. 

For the first two short ferries, you typically pull up to the dock, wait under five minutes for one of the two constantly moving ferries, drive aboard and are on your way. But not yesterday. Yesterday, only one ferry was operating which slowed things down by half. And then there was a cement mixer that took forever to maneuver onto the tiny ferry.

Eric was beside himself, worried that we would miss our reservation for the big ferry and miss the funeral.

But we didn’t. We made it with barely any time to spare, but we made it. Because we had left earlier than necessary and built-in some time for the unexpected.

I hate being late.

If I have a 10:00 meeting, I will arrive at 9:45 to scope out the area and be sure I know exactly where I’m going. If I have a 3:00 doctor’s appointment, I will arrive at 2:45 because I know there’s going to be paperwork. On our first date, Eric found me seated at the bar of the restaurant where we were to meet, sipping champagne and reading a book. He swears that was the moment he decided I was the girl for him.

Being 15 minutes early does so many good things.

Being early reduces your stress and minimizes that cortisol dump -- the stress hormone -- you feel when you are late for something.

Unlike the poor white rabbit, being early gives you the chance to take a moment to talk to people. The chance to say more than “hello goodbye.” The chance to connect.

Being early lets you take control of a situation. When I was practicing law, I would always be the first to arrive for a meeting. I would go into the conference room, choose the seat I wanted and set my documents on the table. When other people walked in, I was already there, poised and ready.

Scheduling to be 15 minutes early means that when things don’t go exactly as planned -- when GPS sends you astray, when your kid needs a potty stop, when a cement mixer has trouble getting off the ferry -- you will still be on time.

Be 15 minutes early.

I know that for some people, being on time -- much less 15 minutes early -- is a challenge. Perhaps you get so caught up in what you are doing that you lose track of time. Maybe you have difficulty accurately estimating how long a task will take or how long it will take you to get someplace. Maybe you have three-year-old twins (in which case getting anywhere is a challenge, and getting someplace on time almost impossible).

Or maybe you just don’t think it’s important. But it is. Being late causes unnecessary stress and inconveniences other people, both of which can be avoided with better planning and better tools.

Here are three tools to try:

  • There are apps that enable you to put in the time you would like to arrive at a destination and will then calculate what time you should leave and, if you wish, put an alarm on that will tell you when it is time to go.

  • Instead of putting the time something starts on your calendar, put the time you need to leave or begin to prepare.

  • Practice showing up a little bit early and begin to build in that habit of being on time or, better yet, early. You’ll likely come to appreciate the reduced stress you experience and be encouraged to continue to build a new timeliness habit.

I know what you are thinking. Other people are late all the time, so if you are prompt or even early, you might be the one waiting. But that’s okay, truly. When I meet friends to walk I am almost always there first. Some days, I take that five minutes to check my email. But other days, I take those few minutes to take a few deep breaths and reach my arms to the sky to greet the day. 

joyce shulman